Stray Thoughts

The most profound change that testosterone therapy has induced is heightened mental clarity. Ironically, it is this change that has caused me to question whether this is a good use of time, or if it is merely exhibitionism. The future of this blog is uncertain. While I have a moment, I would like to address a couple of different topics. 

I have a good opinion of the self-aware autosexual community, and have previously spoken highly of Phil Illy’s Autoheterosexual. I have since realized that the book is flawed. While I still believe it is valuable for natal males who experience gender dysphoria, I understand several of the criticisms that have been raised, and plan to write a brief critique in the near future. 

 Phil’s harshest critics liken autosexuality to another dangerous internet cult, and criticize his comments on pedophilia. In my opinion, autogynephilia is somewhere between homosexuality and pedophilia with regards to how inherently dangerous it is. Similar comments can be made towards autoandrophilia, although it is less inherently dangerous than autogynephilia due to disparities in aggression, strength, and criminality between the sexes. 

Some parallels can be drawn between the self-aware autosexual community and the “virtuous pedophile” community. On paper, the goals of the “virtuous pedophile” community might seem noble, but the website promotes the notion that pedophiles do not pose a threat to children (“I’m no more a threat to children than anyone on the planet”) with at least one member accused of raping his foster daughter. The normalization of pedophilia is clearly amoral. Can the same be said of autogynephilia? 

Autogynephiles who are not self-aware are notoriously manipulative and dishonest. I do not think the same can be said for all self-aware AGPs, but disturbing behaviors and comments have been displayed by at least one noteworthy figure: Anne Lawrence, author of Men Trapped in Men’s Bodies, who promotes the castration of underage boys and “performed a non-consensual genital exam on [an] unconscious woman.” 

Contrary to what has been promoted by activists, a person’s sexuality is not a matter of identity. It is simply a property of a person, and one that cannot be chosen. I think it is accurate to categorize myself as “autoandrophilic”, at least as a descriptive category. This does not necessarily mean that the Autoandrophilic Theory of Gender Dysphoria is correct, and social contagion theory might be correct instead. Among self-aware autosexuals, more needs to be done to acknowledge destructive patterns of behavior that recur in autogynephiles and autoandrophiles. 

The second thing I want to briefly address is the issue of homophobia. I have concerns that some of my past comments contribute to homophobia, specifically with the description of “brain-restricted intersexuality” found in Early Onset Transsexuals. These androgynous brain phenotypes are also found in homosexuals of both sexes. To frame this as a pathology that requires medical intervention is deeply homophobic. 

Two things must be prioritized. First, Early Onset Transsexuals need to organize among themselves, where they are educated on the differences between their etiology and Late Onset Transsexuality. Late Onset Transsexuals go great lengths to try to diminish these differences, but they are easy to identify once they have been explained clearly. Because they belong to the same category of person, Early Onset Transsexuals also need to network with non-transsexual homosexuals and detransitioners of the same etiology, to determine whether they truly benefit from these brutal hormonal and surgical interventions. I am not sure that there is compelling evidence that this is the case, especially in natal males but also in natal females. 

Secondly, a top priority must be to completely destigmatize androgynous homosexuality, in males and in females. For this reason, I am strongly in favor of same-sex marriage. These efforts should minimize the amount of unnecessary medical trauma inflicted on homosexuals, possibly causing it to vanish entirely. 

I have a clear end goal in mind for this blog. The internet doesn’t need another crazy person blogging about transsexuality. The plan is to write a brief series of essays that I will publish on Substack. What I hope to achieve is to provide evidence for an association between “androgynemorphophilia” (cuntboy fetish), autoandrophilia, and female-to-male transsexuality. My stance is that the Autoandrophilic Theory of Gender Dysphoria accounts for some FTM transsexuals, but the theory is being applied too broadly, discouraging sexologists from researching it seriously. There are also people trying to claim that autoandrophilia is not a fetish, which too is objectionable. 

My hope is to help gender dysphoric females understand their condition, so they can make the best long-term decisions for their future. If a non-transsexual finds these essays, my intent is to counteract the dishonesty from activists, and demonstrate that transsexuality can also be a fetish in females. Finally, I hope this information reaches therapists, where it helps them develop more effective strategies in treating gender dysphoria. Cross-sex hormones and surgical interventions should only be considered last resort options that are pursued after trying therapy first. Insurance companies should not be paying for the cosmetic procedures of paraphiliacs, but it should not be outlawed for adults.

I am planning to return in full swing by the winter. If I get a burst of energy, I might complete some of these essays by autumn.